what to do about retirement account access?

[christineseip]

 
in our mediation settlement, i was awarded half of the proceeds of my ex's 2 retirement accounts.

the problem?  i recently decided to withdraw my portion early.  i need the money at this time.  more importantly, he has given me no reason to trust him-between his conduct during our marriage, and his financial misconduct both regarding our finances and the the finances of an organization in which he held a responsible position.  if given a chance, i feel sure he will attempt to drain both accounts.

since our split, he has relocated halfway across the country.  his atty has made multiple attempts to call and e-mail him.  he's playing the old "voice mailbox is full" and "not checking e-mails" tricks that i knew and loved during our marriage.

he is making a final attempt by sending a registered letter.  if no response, he is planning to "fire" my ex as a client.  my atty said, at that point, we would need to file a motion in court.

is there anything i can do to expedite this?  as i said, the money is necessary.  also, i really don't want to be in the position of having to file suit if he does siphon off the accounts-obviously very expensive, although i will if necessary.

any advice would be welcome.

[m_t]

Was a QDRO done?

[christineseip]

not yet-my atty mentioned something about them, but i don't really know how to go about it.  she tried explaining it, but the process sounded complicated and nitpicky.

if you could fill me in at all, i'd love to hear what's up with that.

[m_t]

Start by reading here http://divorceinfo.com/qdro.htm

[livealittle]

you should also review www.irs.gov and look up the sections on tax issues for divorcing couples. Under certain situations, transferring the retirement account to your name can generate a tax liability (fairly hefty) and in others it doesn't.

[Lee Borden]

You don't need to wait for your Ex's lawyer to withdraw from the case. Your attorney can go ahead and file now. I think what you need is a QDRO, but it's hard to know for sure from your post. If your lawyer thinks the QDRO for a defined contribution plan is too complicated and nitpicky, you may want to enter "[your state] QDRO" in your search engine and see if you can find someone who focuses on producing QDROs. It will be far harder without your Ex's help and cooperation, but it's doable.

If this is a defined benefit plan (like a pension), your lawyer is right; it IS complicated and nitpicky and will be more expensive.