someone to talk to!!!! please

[Coordman's Clever New Screen Name]

I think I might understand the word "hotheaded" better.  

Yeah ..I can see you relating to that one...

Shun is what stood out to me...

shun   /ʃʌn/ Show Spelled Pronunciation  [shuhn] Show IPA Pronunciation 

?verb (used with object), shunned, shun⋅ning. to keep away from (a place, person, object, etc.), from motives of dislike, caution, etc.; take pains to avoid.

And yet, here you are.  You call this avoiding?  It seems that this would be yet another word you don't quite grasp.

Ridicule is not exactly something I remember as being a Christian value, but then it has  been a few years for me.  If you ever find yourself wondering why I stopped trusting Christians, AM, I want you to think back on this moment.  The reason I originally began questioning religion was because of so-called Christians who act like this.  Who speak of forgiveness and redemption in one breath, and then tear apart a person at the lowest point in their life with the next.  You like words?  How about this one:

hypocrisy

noun
1.  an expression of agreement that is not supported by real conviction 
2.  insincerity by virtue of pretending to have qualities or beliefs that you do not really have 


All I'm saying is that, if you're going to go around bearing the cross, try to look like you deserve it. 

I grasp it very well...she posted...I gave my opinion.."shunned", and some didn't like it. Those who didn't wanted to comment to me, so I commented back to them.

What's so hard to grasp about that?

Seems to me, you're the one having a grasping problem

Re-read your definition, AM.  To shun means to avoid.  If you had been "shunning", you would have read her post, decided you didn't like it, and left the thread without posting.  To shun the subject would have been to avoid it entirely.  What you did was to repel and offend.

[Ann Marie]

I think I might understand the word "hotheaded" better.  

Yeah ..I can see you relating to that one...

Shun is what stood out to me...

shun   /ʃʌn/ Show Spelled Pronunciation  [shuhn] Show IPA Pronunciation 

?verb (used with object), shunned, shun⋅ning. to keep away from (a place, person, object, etc.), from motives of dislike, caution, etc.; take pains to avoid.

And yet, here you are.  You call this avoiding?  It seems that this would be yet another word you don't quite grasp.

Ridicule is not exactly something I remember as being a Christian value, but then it has  been a few years for me.  If you ever find yourself wondering why I stopped trusting Christians, AM, I want you to think back on this moment.  The reason I originally began questioning religion was because of so-called Christians who act like this.  Who speak of forgiveness and redemption in one breath, and then tear apart a person at the lowest point in their life with the next.  You like words?  How about this one:

hypocrisy

noun
1.  an expression of agreement that is not supported by real conviction 
2.  insincerity by virtue of pretending to have qualities or beliefs that you do not really have 


All I'm saying is that, if you're going to go around bearing the cross, try to look like you deserve it. 

I grasp it very well...she posted...I gave my opinion.."shunned", and some didn't like it. Those who didn't wanted to comment to me, so I commented back to them.

What's so hard to grasp about that?

Seems to me, you're the one having a grasping problem

Re-read your definition, AM.  To shun means to avoid.  If you had been "shunning", you would have read her post, decided you didn't like it, and left the thread without posting.  To shun the subject would have been to avoid it entirely.  What you did was to repel and offend.

You might want to re-copy the post above, cause I edited to add while you posted.

Guess I didn't shun when I should have, huh?

[Coordman's Clever New Screen Name]

Ok, you're not even making any sense anymore.  You justify all the nasty things you said with this:

Proverbs 14:16

A wise man fears the LORD and shuns evil, but a fool is hotheaded and reckless.

Then you intentionally point out that you're doing ANYTHING but actually shunning, which is to say avoiding?  And then you act proud of it?  Have you been hitting the Jack early tonight?

But before all of this, you actually manage to compare yourself to John The Baptist?  The man was a visionary who had widely unpopular ideas, but brilliant ones nonetheless... you're just mean.  There isn't even a speck of comparison there.

And another thing, I gave up Christianity for my own reasons, not because of other people.  But it was the actions of PEOPLE (like yourself) that proved to me that Christians can't necessarily be trusted, which is what started me thinking about how their teachings may be just as false as their actions.  So, in a very real way, you yourself, and the things you say and do, drove me to atheism Ann Marie.  So I suppose I should really be thanking you.

From the bottom of my heart, Ann Marie, thank you for showing me the true path.   

[Coordman's Clever New Screen Name]

Ok.  Sorry m_t, I'm done. 

Buttons, you know.   

[Wolfy]

Kik

Let me say that while I don't agree with what you did, I have made more than my share of mistakes. I have learned that if you make a mistake you are human. If you make the same mistake twice you are the fool. Learn from your previous mistakes and move on. I give you credit for coming back here. Many people would have been scared off and never returned. But your story did bring out a very important conversation and got many of us to think about the things we have done in the past and are not proud of. You have gotten off to a rocky start, but your not the first and wont be the last. Welcome.

[Cam]

Good post Wolfy !

[kikayme23]

hi! sorry if im not responding on this post as soon as possible, first i had my vacation. and think it overnight but again in my situation i cant solve it overnight. second i have a pc in our house but i cannot write because i lve w/ my parents and im afraid that they might be see me crying while in computer.......  im reading all the comments last night just wanted to say sorry if im posting my pain in a wrong board that time that i was posting it all i wanted is to throw out my feelings coz i cant kept it anymore. even my friends doesnt know about it. im happy and sad when i read the comments happy at least on the advices that they give i can get strength on it. sad because i saw now what other think of me when im into a relation like this. before i dont mind on what other saying ..., yes ive been selfish im not denying it......  right now im in a stage that i have to regain the respect for my self and starting to talk to god and ask for forgiveness. ....  posting in this board helps me a lot and realized more about my self and the stupid things that ive done.

[Ann Marie]

Ok, you're not even making any sense anymore.  You justify all the nasty things you said with this:

Proverbs 14:16

A wise man fears the LORD and shuns evil, but a fool is hotheaded and reckless.

Then you intentionally point out that you're doing ANYTHING but actually shunning, which is to say avoiding?  And then you act proud of it?  Have you been hitting the Jack early tonight?

But before all of this, you actually manage to compare yourself to John The Baptist?  The man was a visionary who had widely unpopular ideas, but brilliant ones nonetheless... you're just mean.  There isn't even a speck of comparison there.

And another thing, I gave up Christianity for my own reasons, not because of other people.  But it was the actions of PEOPLE (like yourself) that proved to me that Christians can't necessarily be trusted, which is what started me thinking about how their teachings may be just as false as their actions.  So, in a very real way, you yourself, and the things you say and do, drove me to atheism Ann Marie.  So I suppose I should really be thanking you.

From the bottom of my heart, Ann Marie, thank you for showing me the true path.   

Is this where we insert the  "Hotheaded" part?

I think I might understand the word "hotheaded" better.  

BTW...I wasn't comparing myself to John The Baptist as you are refering that I am....I was just pointing out he wasn't liked either for what he said.

There's no way I'd concider myself anything close to what that man was.

You're accountable before God for your own actions Coordman, you can't pin what you are on me.

Nice try tho

[Cam]

kik you said it 'stupid things'  NOT stupid you .   More like foolish you and yes we have all been foolish at one time or another and made terrible mistakes that have hurt others and probably we didn't truly think of their feelings at the time we made our decisions to do something we had our doubts about. 

I do believe owning up for our mistakes and trying to right them in any way as long as it is sincere is a start to the better person we can be.  Hearing the truth stated by someone about the pain we may have caused and then reaped is sometimes what we need to hear in order to stop and truly think of our actions and the results of them. 

To take responsiblilty for our choices in this life.  If we never open our eyes or never have someone open them how can we ever learn to change harmful behaviors. 
So talk to us and remorse with us and tell us your side and let us try to understand and we will all get thru this one way or the other. 

You will be fine because you have taken the first step to being a stronger person in this life and that step was coming forward to face all the ridicule and hostility as if we were the ones wronged. 
Stay strong and keep in touch. 


AM without tough love no matter how painful some of us just don't grow and I am referring to me.   

[Wolfy]

Kik

I would like to suggest that you find someone where you live that you can talk to. We will help you in any way we can but there is nothing like talking to a live person. Seeing the expression on their face during a conversation and getting a hug when you need it the most. Maybe their is a preist or friend you could talk to.

[Ann Marie]

AM without tough love no matter how painful some of us just don't grow and I am referring to me.   

You're an awesome woman Cam

[alpurl]

Kik,

Welcome to HELL.

Sure, your introductory post stirred up one hell of a hornets nest. Sure, for many of us, there are still some pretty strong feelings just beneath a calm surface.

In my OPINION, it just means that there's still a great deal of healing that needs to take place. Myself included.

As I said in an earlier post, truth promotes growth and freedom.

Since we're in preacher mode, think about this verse.
"If you are my disciples indeed, then you shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free."

We are all human. We have feelings and hopes and dreams. For many of us, our experiences have pretty much left all of that on life support. But, we are here, working together to slog through our problems, heal, and grow.

Among many things, my wife cheated on me with another man who was living under my roof. To make matters worse, even after he was gone, she still put her own wants ahead of the needs of her family, particularly those of her daughter who is now 5.

We also have a lot to learn from ourselves about ourselves, from life about life, and from each other about everything.

My understanding of the Asian cultures, even with a strong tendency toward Christianity is that the OLD Asian ways and customs are still VERY strong, and there tends to be quite a bit of melding between the Christian beliefs and the older Asian culture. Is this true, or has that changed?

With time, patience, soul-searching, honesty, and courage, you CAN grow from this and be better for it. We CAN help you. The question is who of us WILL?

[Cam]

Kik,

Welcome to HELL.

Sure, your introductory post stirred up one hell of a hornets nest. Sure, for many of us, there are still some pretty strong feelings just beneath a calm surface.

In my OPINION, it just means that there's still a great deal of healing that needs to take place. Myself included.

As I said in an earlier post, truth promotes growth and freedom.

Since we're in preacher mode, think about this verse.
"If you are my disciples indeed, then you shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free."

We are all human. We have feelings and hopes and dreams. For many of us, our experiences have pretty much left all of that on life support. But, we are here, working together to slog through our problems, heal, and grow.

Among many things, my wife cheated on me with another man who was living under my roof. To make matters worse, even after he was gone, she still put her own wants ahead of the needs of her family, particularly those of her daughter who is now 5.

We also have a lot to learn from ourselves about ourselves, from life about life, and from each other about everything.

My understanding of the Asian cultures, even with a strong tendency toward Christianity is that the OLD Asian ways and customs are still VERY strong, and there tends to be quite a bit of melding between the Christian beliefs and the older Asian culture. Is this true, or has that changed?

With time, patience, soul-searching, honesty, and courage, you CAN grow from this and be better for it. We CAN help you. The question is who of us WILL?

I just like the way you post ,  always direct and to the point to where even I can appreciate it .

[alpurl]

Well Cam,

I appreciate that you can and DO appreciate my posts and the way I post.

I am grateful for the fact that there is something you or anyone else can take from my posts and that it's not just a cathartic experience for me. I find that in helping others, I help myself. Somehow, I doubt that I'm the only one with that "problem."

[Stephy]

AM, stop taking your bad days out on those who post here.  I'm sorry about your issues with your dad.  But I think you post with venom here when you're having a hard time with him. I also think your lack of compassion is due to issues you have still to work out with your divorces.

 Just admit it, vent and deal with it.  As you say  ad nauseum "BTDT." BOORRING!!  I have too, and it sucks. I was cheated on. I watched my mother die a slow death due to MS for 25 years.  She is gone now and was just 60.  Suck it up! You still have your dad.  How would you like ME trashing your current life situation?