Question on Alimony in Virginia

[leftalone]

Hi, I am new here so please bear with me.

3 weeks ago my  husband left. He gave no reason just said he wanted to be alone. Well fast  forward a few weeks and I find hes with his ex wife. And from what i can find out he has been for over 6 months.

We have been married for 3 years but living together for 10 years. hes supported me fully all that time. Claimed me on his taxes the entire time. I have never worked. He never wanted me to. I now have heath reasons that make it hard for me to find a job. He has the training & experience to make a very good living. I do not.

When he left he promised he would still take care of me. Well of course that changed.'

My question is should I be able to get alimony with the short marriage since hes supported me for years before that? I can prove it by his tax records of claiming me as a sole dependent

Thank you so much!

[m_t]

I think it's pretty doubtful, hon. IF you're really, really lucky with a kick-ass lawyer, you might get a couple of years out of him so you can get yourself trained in something. But... You're more likely than not going to have to support yourself.

[TC]

My first question would be.....if you weren't married to him for the first seven years, how was he able to claim you on his taxes? 

As to your immediate question, I agree with MT...very doubtful.  Your best bet is going to end up being for you to document everything you brought into the marriage and everything the two of you accumulated after you married him.  You should be entitled to half of everything the two of you accumulated together after you were married.....depending on your state, and unless your state recognizes common law marriages, anything the two of you accumulated prior to being married is questionable.

Your best bet in this case is to get yourself a kick ass lawyer....MT is right on that one for sure.

It might also help you out if you can document that your medical problems were diagnosed AFTER the two of you were married...not sure, but it is worth a shot.

TC

[m_t]

I have never worked. He never wanted me to. I now have heath reasons that make it hard for me to find a job. He has the training & experience to make a very good living. I do not.

I somehow missed this part the first read. How old are you that you have never worked? What did you do for the other years of your life prior to meeting this man? (*)

Not that it makes your chances any more likely. We've had posters who have been married for donkey's years and only received temporary alimony.

(*) I ask mostly to help drive home the point to people that we simply cannot allow our daughters to think that being supported by someone else is okay. They *must* become self-sufficient and able to support themselves.

[leftalone]

I am 48.
Spent over 20 years married to my 1st husband. And you are right about the self supporting thing. But whats done is done & now I have no way to support myself and will have to live with the messed up choices I have made in my life

[TC]

You still didn't answer my question...how did your stbx claim you on his taxes for the seven years you lived togeather before you got married.  I don't understand this?

TC

[m_t]

I am 48.
Spent over 20 years married to my 1st husband. And you are right about the self supporting thing. But whats done is done & now I have no way to support myself and will have to live with the messed up choices I have made in my life

Okay.... So... did you give up alimony when you remarried? If so, that may be an avenue to explore.

However, we have had women older than you who've been married for over 20 years and received only temp alimony while they retrained/went to school. So even a long marriage isn't a guarantee of alimony. If I were in your shoes, I would start searching out displaced homemaker services (I think most areas have them) which will help you develop and/or hone the skills you need to become self-sufficient. You're going to have to become proactive. 'Cause I don't see this guy as being held responsible for your support for long, if at all.

[leftalone]

I have never heard of displaced homemaker services thank you I will deff. check into this!

And if you provide more than 50% of a persons support you can claim them on your taxes

[TC]

I have never heard of displaced homemaker services thank you I will deff. check into this!

And if you provide more than 50% of a persons support you can claim them on your taxes

Interesting...was not aware of this....especially if there is no blood relationship.

TC

[livealittle]

I have never heard of displaced homemaker services thank you I will deff. check into this!

And if you provide more than 50% of a persons support you can claim them on your taxes

Interesting...was not aware of this....especially if there is no blood relationship.

TC

http://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/p501.pdf

there's the link TC to that rule.  It's on the table on the right hand side.  It's is specified as a qualifying relative who is not your child and gives a list.  People who live together and are "common-law" married often file together as "married filing jointly".  You don't have to provide a marriage certificate to do so, but it does take longer to get refunds and such back. 

[TC]

Thanks Livi...never dealt with the whole common law thing.....

Just proves ya learn somethign new every day

T

[ant23]

I think it's pretty doubtful, hon. IF you're really, really lucky with a kick-ass lawyer, you might get a couple of years out of him so you can get yourself trained in something. But... You're more likely than not going to have to support yourself.

[chill]

Leftalone, do what the other people suggest.

Don't feel like life is over.  I held jobs off and on throughout my life time, But my number one priority has/was always my kids and husband.  Finally after ending up a lot like you, I decided to go back to college and get another degree.  I am almost 50 and just started a new career.  The cool thing is...........I don't have to rely on other people to pay my bills.  I also have health issues.  So know that, life isn't over, a better life might be in front of you.

Go to the community college and talk to a counselor, ask them about programs for displaced woman.  I used different programs to get me through.
good luck