spousal support

[Cam]

i moved over here after reading your posts to buckeye ... i have talked with my atty .. she didn't seem real promising on ss she said i needed to show where i was trying to get a job or get training to get a job ... she also had me write a letter stating why i thought i needed ss ... and how much i thought i should get and to keep it low?
i wanted $1000 a month for 12 years and she said $600 for 3 years .. i said no at least $900 a month for 3 years while i get training and get a job and $600 a month for the next 3 years while i'm getting settled in that job ... am i being unreasonable or is she challenging me to see if i will cave ?  he makes $53K a year ... she also told me to forget about the property and not to try to get my son's 20 acres for him .. that it had to be counted in as marital estate because no money had exchanged hands and there was no written contract ... i asked for the house and 20 acres .. we have 80 total ... by selling the 40 to the north it will clear up all our debts , totally...
my stbx got another postponement on the master list .. the date is now the 12th of may ... my atty said i needed to get a my own  appraisal  .. i'm not sure if that is necessary ...

i also found out the tribe did not offer him any money down to pay me off .. he was going to borrow it from his sister and buy me out for a little of nothing .. $15K to $20K is what he said and no ss , no pension nothing else at all .... i said no way ....
the tribe's fiscal year begins October 1st and they said they would not have any money to buy land until then ....
can the divorce go thru before then and then the land sold or would it be safer to hang on and get the land sold first ..then finalize the divorce .. ?  thanks camp

[TC]

I don't know what is fair, reasonable, or the norm for SS in your area....I do know that based on what you have stated....if he makes 53K, you are asking for one fifth of that as SS.....what is the norm for your area?  Do you know?  That should be your goal...not a figure you pull out of thin air.

As for the 20 acres for your son....you may or may not be entitled to the 20 acres...but it will be awarded based on YOUR entitlement, not what was promised to your son....he really has no dog in this fight. 

As for the tribal lands....gut reaction only...so take it for what it is worth...but I think you are better off knowing what you get for it instead of hoping for what you get for it.

Food for thought...

TC

[Cam]

thanks tc

[aadams]

my divorce was final last december. I went to a "well Known" attorney thinking he could help me. my ex and I lived together 4 years off and on and were married for 9 years. He was verbaly, mentally, financially, and physically abusive to me. I tried to get alimony, but instead they gave me rehabilitaion alimony for $400.00 a month. This amount was set by my ex and the attorney said i should accept since this was a "gift" and he did not have to give me anything my ex has his own business that he started after we were married and makes at least 50,000.00 ayear. I have been laid off, get $175.00 a week in unemployment benefits, and baby sit on the side. when he first started giving me $400.00 a month i made $8.50 an hour. I am a single mother of a child he has raised as his own for 13 years. anytime we need extra help he deducts the $400.00 a month in the amount he helps out with. The attorney said that i could not prove that domestic violence occurred since i did not go to court. however there are police reports, and dr. reports. is there any way that i can take him back to court for more support?

[TC]

Doubtful at this point.  You accepted the original amount so unless there are extenuating circumstances that, the court is unlikely to make changes at this point.  At least that is my opinion.  I'm not an attorney, but I am willing to bet I'm pretty much on target.

How long ago was your divorce final?

TC