question from Alisonjane

[livealittle]

I moved this here for you, alisonjane, so it would be seen.

I am just entering the divorce arena after 23 years of marriage and 5 children between us.  By mutual agreement I stayed home full time all these years to bear and raise our children.  Both my husband and I agreed this was best for our family for me to give up all career and earning power as neither of of believe(d) in divorce. Now that he has changed his mind, how much of the equity of the house can I expect to recieve in Wahsington State?  (We live in King county, the most expensive cost of living in the state)  Obviously I am not objective, but it sure seems like I should get more than half since I will never recover at age 47 to begin earning  anything close to what he can (computer and technical sales). 
My youngest is 9 and I am hoping to work out an agreement where in the settlement, he will continue to make it financially possible for myself and the kids to stay here until she graduates from HS (9 more years).  My reason for this is my limited ability to earn and income that would allow us to stay in the area and limit emotional, social, and personal disruption in the lives of the 3 youngest children (my two oldest will both be over 18 by the time the divorce goes through).
Thanks for any insights!

[Lee Borden]

I can't speak for WA, but in my state, assuming your STBX earns a strong professional income, this would be a permanent alimony case, meaning one in which the wage-earner (your STBX) would be required to pay alimony or spousal support to you after the divorce, independent of and in addition to any child support, until you remarry or cohabitate.

You've said nothing about retirement plans or other assets, so I won't venture a guess about who might end up with the house. Just know that one of the most frequent mistakes made by wives like you in divorce is to try to keep living in a house they can't afford. Consider asking for more of your STBX's retirement plan instead, which would allow you to live in greater comfort and security in your later years.